DEAN & BRITTA have a new, delightfully retro video for "Words You Used To Say" that the kids at Stereogum and Chromewaves think is a partial homage to this Serge Gainsbourg video.  The kids also seem to agree that Britta is teh hottness; sorry, guys -- D&B are hitched.

NEW RELEASES:  Arcade Fire is obviously the big new release in indieworld... and probably beyond.  Their buzz got as far as The New York Times Magazine over the weekend.  Son Volt, The Stooges, Bright Eyes, Mary Chapin Carpenter, !!! and more are streaming in full this week via Spinner.  BTW, Son Volt mastermind Jay Farrar does good interview with the Hartford Courant on the themes and tone of The Search.  Broken Social Scene spin-off Apostle of Hustle releases the National Anthem of Nowhere.  Super Furry Anumal Gruff Rhys releases Candylion.  Ry Cooder releases My Name is Buddy -- a concept album about a cat named Buddy.  As noted yesterday, sometimes Roxy Music crooner Bryan Ferry releases his album of Dylanesque covers.  Robyn Hitchcock & the Venus 3 release a live EP.  The Stooges' Fun House, Television's Marquee Moon, and Okkervil River's Black Sheep Boy all get deluxe reissues.  Johnny Cash and Elvis Presley get gospel compilations.  Several of the new releases have enough advance reviews to make Metacritic already.

VAN HALEN:  Eddie and Alex Van Halen, David Lee Roth, Michael Anthony and Sammy Hagar have all told the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame that they will be attending the induction ceremony on March 12th -- but they will not be performing; Velvet Revolver will be stepping in to pay tribute.

RONNIE SPECTOR'S interview about her upcoming induction into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame is currently streaming at NPR.  Ronnie recently learned that her ex-husband, famed "wall of sound" producer and murder suspect Phil Spector had moved to oppose The Ronettes' admission into the hall as far back as 1994.

CASIMIR PULASKI DAY was yesterday.  I forgot (as it's no longer a a work holiday for me), but Athsmatic Kitty and Pitchfork offered up the demo of the Sufjan Steven song named after -- but not really about it.  Here's a bit on the actual Pulaski.

TWOFER TUESDAY:  My two favorite performances from Juliana Hatfield are probably her cover of "Temptation Eyes" with the Blake Babies and her solo track, "My Sister."

NEIL YOUNG, Swedish garage rockers Mando Diao and the more arty Blonde Redhead can be seen on 3x3 via AOL.  The Neil Young performance is from the recently unearthed Massey hall gig from 1971.

BONO will edit an issue of Vanity Fair in his ongoing effort to rebrand Africa for the idle rich. 

SHAWN COLVIN may suffer from depression, but it didn't stop her from becoming the latest to cover Gnarls Barkley's "Crazy," which you can stream via Spinner.

WOLFGANG'S VAULT, sued by Led Zeppelin, the Grateful Dead, Santana and the Doors by selling merchandise and streaming concert archives belonging to the musicians, has filed a counterclaim against the musicians and their labels, arguing that case is actually a blatant attempt by two of the largest record labels in the world -- using artists as a front -- to secure new income streams and destroy a legitimate business.

BRITNEY SPEARS:  A source tells US Weekly that the Spears family is worried that the troubled pop tart may not last the scheduled month in rehab.  Which tends to support the rumors that Spears tried to hang herself while claiming to be an anti-christ.

NICOLE RICHIE was hospitalized after falling ill on the set of her reality series.  Dizzy spells are not unknown when you're on the Skeletor diet.

COURTNEY LOVE totally narced on the French Hotel's birthday party, using her website to note a big pile of white powder in the rest room.  Big fans of talc, I'm sure.

TOM-KAT UPDATE:  The paparazzi at X17 have pics and video they say show the Tom-Kitten's resemblance to Cruise.

GREY'S ANATOMY co-star Isaiah Washington -- just out of gay-slur rehab -- got an NAACP Image Award last Friday.  Better luck next year, Ann Coulter!

JESSICA BIEL'S 25th birthday party is the subject of some subtle deadpan humor at People magazine.  The mag notes that the shapely actress happily took a piece of cake, declaring: "I'm not one of those skinny actors. I've got meat on my bones."  The next sentence:  "Other guests at the party included Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen and supermodels Jessica Stam, Daria Werbowy, and Gemma Ward."

GEORGE CLOONEY has come out for Sen. Barack Obama's presidential campaign, calling him "the true rock star" of the Democratic Party.  Clooney has publicly offered to raise money for Obama as well.

STEVEN SPIELBERG is the proud owner of stolen property, i.e., "Russian Schoolroom," a Norman Rockwell painting stolen from a gallery in the St. Louis suburb of Clayton, MO, more than three decades ago.  Spielberg purchased the painting in 1989 from a legitimate dealer and didn't know it was stolen until his staff spotted its image last week on an FBI Web site listing stolen works of art, according to the feds.

HARRY POTTER & THE ORDER OF THE PHOENIX:  The Leaky Cauldron and Aint-It-Cool-News have reviews from a test screening in Chicago.  SPOILERS in each.  RELATED:  Daniel Radcliffe has signed on to star in the final two Harry Potter films, according to Warner Bros.

THE GEICO CAVEMEN are getting a half-hour sitcom pilot for ABC.  The Wall Street Journal looks at brand extension, including the scary news that the creepy Burger King has lined up a studio and distributor for a feature film.

BLACK SHEEP:  It's "Violence of the Lambs!"  See the trailer on the Tube or in glorious Quicktime.  More proof -- if any was needed -- that there is nothing quite so dangerous as a clever sheep.

SPIDERMAN 3 video is running at NBC today only.

THE 'STANS:  ABCNews reports that efforts are underway to identify the dead following the US and NATO strike in a remote area of eastern Afghanistan over the weekend.  US officials say that the CIA is moving additional manpower and equipment into Pakistan in the effort to find Osama bin Laden and Ayman al Zawahri -- which suggests to me that they don't think either was killed in that Afghan raid.  The Christian Science Monitor surveys the state of al Qaeda today.   Over 2,000 Afghans in Khost demonstrated against suicide bombings.

IRAN:  A former Iranian deputy defense minister with knowledge of the nuclear and defense establishment has gone missing in Turkey, sparking allegations of a Mossad and CIA-linked kidnapping. The UN's nuke watchdog thinks Iran may have temporarily halted its nuclear program.  But a senior Iranian official dashed hopes that any short-term pause could translate into Tehran accepting a UN Security Council demand to freeze its enrichment activities.

IRAQ:  The Interior Ministry now claims it has captured the second in command of the Islamic State in Iraq, not the top guy as previously claimed; the report remains unconfirmed.  The Islamic State of Iraq has reverted back to the practice of posting execution videos.  The Interior Ministry is also investigating how weapons seized during military operations find their way back to the black market. (hint: a mirror might help.)  A "senior Iraqi official" says Moqtada al-Sadr has been pressured to chill out by Ayatollah Sistani, the Shia clerical leadership in Najaf, and even Iran.  The US is not so sure about the Iran part; it would have been helpful had Newsweek revealed the sect of its source.  ITM's Omar Fadhil reports that al-Sadr's Mahdi army is not responding to the raids in Baghdad with fire, but are trying to undermine the new security plan by spreading rumors about alleged crimes committed by US soldiers.

OSTRICH NEWS:  Three German teenagers may be on the hook for a hefty fine if a court decides that their festive firecrackers scared the libido right out of an ostrich named Gustav.  In Cornwall, Edgar the ostrich regularly escapes from his home and heads for the local burial ground to chase mourners and eat graveside floral tributes.  Maybe Edgar has the same problem as Gustav.

SQUIRRELS may be forced onto birth control in the People's Republic of Santa Monica.  It's already being done in the People's Republic of Berkeley.

MOUSE revenges itself on a man in the Guangdong province of China.

A ROBIN will eat a worm from the mouth of a nature photographer.  NTTAWWT.  Pic at the link.

MOOSE downs a helicopter near the southeast town of Gustavus, Alaska.  The injured animal was euthanized at the scene.  Was global warming to blame?

BRYAN FERRY talks to London's Telegraph about his upcoming album of Dylan covers.  Ferry is no stranger to covers, natch -- as the clips of  "Will You Love Me Tomorrow" (featuring Anna Nicole Smith) "The In Crowd" (scorching), "Let's Stick Together" (with Jerry Hall), "I Put A Spell on You" and even the 1973 version of Dylan's "A Hard Rain's A-Gonna Fall" attest.  You can preview his 2007 takes on Dylan with "Just Like Tom Thumb's Blues" and "Positively Fourth Street."

MARIANNE  FAITHFULL -- one of rock's consummate survivors -- talks to the Daily Mail about surviving emergency cancer surgery, and the surprise phone call she got from Mick Jagger in recovery.  The paper also embedded video of an oddly uptempo take of the classic "As Tears Go By" from Hullaballoo.

THE BROKEN WEST singer and guitarist Ross Flournoy is conflicted about being tagged as "power pop."  The Boston Globe rightly notes the band is much closer to Big Star or Teenage Fanclub than to the Knack or Shoes.  The paper was also nice enough to link to streaming songs at BrokenWestSpace, so you can hear for yourself.

EL PERRO DEL MAR is touring, so Sarah Assbring is doing the press rounds with eye, NOW, New City Chicago and the Boston Herald.  (Thanks to Chromewaves, though I get New City in the lobby of my building).  Most of the pieces tell the story of how Assbring adopted the name "El Perro del Mar" ("Dog of the Sea"), her stripped-down retro style and her expectations -- or lack of them -- for Canada and the US; in the Boston Herald, she also talks about Sweden's socialized musical education.  You can stream four from HerSpace.

LUCINDA WILLIAMS tells Canada's Globe & Mail that reviewers are missing the underlying optimism of her new album, West.  You can stream a few from HerSpace.

SEEN YOUR VIDEO:  The Jayhawks perform the great and terrible "Blue."

APPLES IN STEREO frontman Robert Schneider tells Chart Attack that he went through a period where "I just became, not just disinterested, but actually offended by the big bells and whistles production that I had always pursued" before making New Magnetic Wonder, which owes more than a little to the lush sound of the Electric Light Orchestra.  Steam a few at TheirSpace.

THE CAT IN THE HAT just turned 50, which is celebrated in this audio feature from NPR, and is a good excuse to relink to the wonderful Dylan Hears A Who, which may require you download the Firefox browser, if you haven't already.

PETE DOHERTY-KATE MOSS UPDATE:  The troubled singer and the supposedly sober supermodel were asked to leave the Shockwaves NME Awards by security after a series of incidents at the ceremony held at Hammersmith Palais.  Said incidents apparently included the couple's blazing bust-up backstage -- broken up by Primal Scream frontman Bobby Gillespie -- after Doherty was caught trying to smuggle a spoon into the loos.

BRITNEY SPEARS has flipped her lid in rehab, trying to hang herself with a bedsheet after scrawling the devil's number "666" across her head and screaming "I am the anti-christ" to frightened staff.  US Weekly has details of her last, pathetic gasp before entering rehab.  The pop tart is getting words of support from Brooke Shields, whose book on postpartum depression Spears is rumored to be reading in rehab.

WEEKEND BOX OFFICE:  Despite lousy reviews, audiences went hog wild for Wild Hogs, which took in 38 million in receipts to become Disney's biggest-ever March opening.  David Fincher's acclaimed Zodiac came in a respectable second with 13.1 million -- ballpark typical for most Fincher films.  Ghost Rider fell to third in its third week of release with 11.5 million, followed by Bridge to Terabithia with 8.6 million and The Number 23, which slid to fifth with 7.1 million in its second week.  Norbit continued to make money in sixth place ,while Music and Lyrics is struggling in seventh, despite dropping a mere 36 percent.  Black Snake Moan took in a mere four million, though it came in third on a per screen average.  Reno 911!: Miami plunged 63 percent to land in ninth place, but has made 16 million on a ten million budget.  Breach rounded out the Top Ten with 3.4 million.

LIZ HURLEY had a surprise civil wedding with Indian businessman Arun Nayar in the Cotswolds last Friday.

THE McCARTNEYS:  It was Sir Paul who emerged smiling from the first significant round in his divorce feud with Heather Mills.  It was the staff at a top London dance studio who were smiling as Mills quit the studio after just one day of practice for Dancing with the Stars.

JOHN RATZENBERGER, known as Cliff Claven on Cheers and a voice talent for PIxar animations, will replace Vincent "Big P*ssy" Pastore, who quit after one week of training for Dancing with the Stars.

BRADGELINA:  Jolie has filed papers to adopt a Vietnamese child, and it seems that US and Vietnamese officials will bend the rules to make it happen.

GREY'S ANATOMY;  Disgruntled starlet Katherine Heigl is blaming ABC's Touchstone for going public on their salary dispute, though it seemed like her people did that.

KIRSTEN DUNST:  Someone is spreading nasty rumors about old MJ.

EVANGELINE LILLY:  The Lost hottie is attracted to men who are in touch with their feminine side and are able to pick out clothes for her -- which explains her long-term relationship with co-star and ex-Hobbit Dominic Monaghan.

SIENNA MILLER tells London's Guardian that she always ends up putting my big fat foot in it.  Indeed, she does so in the interview when asked why people take drugs:  "'Cos they're fun! 'Cos they're f*ckloads of fun! No, don't write that..."  She later added: " I liked mushrooms, which were legal until a year or so ago. If I had a drug of choice, it would be magic mushrooms."

JOHN BELUSHI died 25 years ago today, but his comedy -- and his influence on comedy -- last to this day.  For example, the Peacock lawyers have missed this classic clip of Belushi with Joe Cocker on the Show Named Less.  Belushi first developed that impression for National Lampoon's Lemmings -- a Broadway parody of Woodstock.  His breakthrough movie role as Bluto in National Lampoon's Animal House was almost entirely silent, physical comedy, yet his slightly profane, inspirational speech near the climax is ingrained in pop culture.  And I count myself lucky for having been able to see the Blues Brothers live at the long-gone Poplar Creek Music Theater -- and to have Belushi flip his way down the aisle about ten feet away from my seat.

AFGHANISTAN:  ABCNews reports that US and NATO forces have been conducting a major attack against a compound in a remote area of Eastern Afghanistan where Osama bin Laden or another senior al Qaeda leader may be hiding.

IRAQ:  Bill Roggio has a round-up including signs of short term success for the Baghdad security plan (though the Times of London wonders if it can last), a planned reshuffle of the Iraqi cabinet to promote reconciliation, an unconfirmed report from the German press that the leader of al-Qaeda's political front organization has been captured in Salahadin province, and more.  ITM's Omar Fadhil has a detailed on-the-ground report from Baghdad, including new restrictions on cars and over 1000 displaced families returning to the capital.  The Times of London publishes serious academic criticisms of The Lancet study which claimed that there had been 650K civilian casualties.  Stars & Stripes has an update on the two faces of Ramadi.  The Small Wars Journal blog has David Kilcullen correcting misreporting by London's Guardian, as well as Bing West reviewing the good and bad points from his February trip in-country.

IRAN:  Students involved in an angry protest against Pres. Ahmadinejad have been expelled and earmarked for compulsory military service in an apparent act of official retribution.

TERRIERS DOGNAPPED AT GUNPOINT on video have been found and reunited with their owners.  Videos at the link.

WHEN POT-BELLIED PIGS ATTACK... they attack Posh Spice.

EMUS vs. DOGS in a Sea-Tac smackdown!

CAT extracted from the engine of a running car after several hours of rescue efforts.  Video at the link.

DOGS are being trained to use cash machines for their disabled owners in the UK.

THE WEEKEND STARTS HERE:

...with THE MEKONS!  The ever-reliable Wikipedia calls them "one of the longest-running and most prolific of the first-wave British punk rock bands," though they have incorporated elements of English folk, country, and other styles over the years.  For example "Poxy Lips" has a zydeco feel, while "Ghosts of American Astronauts" is swirling, ethereal pop -- and both are from 1988's So Good It Hurts.  "Work All Week" has a bit of the reggae beat, while "Memphis Egypt" is blistering rock 'n' roll.  You can download "Ghosts," Memphis" and the countrified "Hole in the Ground" in glorious QuickTime from Twin/Tone Records.  You can also stream a few equally eclectic tracks via MekonSpace.

THE STOOGES' reunion album comes out next week, but you can stream the whole thing now via VH1.

PEARL JAM reprortedly will headline Lollapalooza this summer, though promoters don't plan on announcing the 130-band lineup or putting tickets on sale for several weeks.

WILCO:  Three advance tracks from Sky Blue Sky leaked onto the Internet.  Though it seems like the band is trying to get them removed, you may also be able to stream "Either Way," "You Are My Face" and "Walken" via the ol' HM.

THE WHITE STRIPES are putting the finishing touches on their next LP, which  will be titled Icky Thump.  Tracklisting at the link.

UNO, DOS... one, two, tres, quatro!

THE SHINS have a performance and interview streaming via Yahoo! Music.

YOKO ONO confesses.

ARCTIC MONKEYS have a new track off the forthcoming Favourite Worst Nightmare, which you can stream via Prefix.

NOISE POP:  This fest kind of slid off my radar screen but Heather Browne has an interview with fest guru Jordan Kurland and MP3s of the bands she's planning to see.  Lala/WOXY are streaming gigs live and on demand, including Ths Submarines, Snowden, Malajube, Midlake, Cake and more...

PETE DOHERTY-KATE MOSS UPDATE:  The troubled singer and the supposedly sober supermodel have reportedly moved in together, with Doherty lugging a banjo, a babyseat, gold records and assorted coats and clothing into Moss's fashionable north London pad.  Also, Doperty was visiting England's Cotswold Wildlife Park when witnesses say that he threw what looked like a spliff to some penguins as a way of showing off for Moss.

THE CUTOUT BIN:  This Friday's fortuitous finds from the ol' HM include: The Cure - Friday, I'm in Love; Iggy Pop - Lust for Life; The Posies - Surrender; Yo La Tengo - Mr. Tough; The B-52s - 53 Miles West of Venus; The Yardbirds - Over Under Sideways Down; Jonathan Richman & The Modern Lovers - Roadrunner; Nancy Sinatra & Lee Hazlewood - Summer Wine; Sam & Dave - Hold On! I'm A Comin'; The Clash - Time Is Tight; Eddie Floyd - Big Bird; Ronnie Spector - You Can't Put Your Arms Around A Memory (J. Thunders); Guns n' Roses - You Can't Put Your Arms Around a Memory (J. Thunders); Ram Jam - Black Betty; Black Flag - TV Party; Ramones - Teenage Lobotomy; and Art Brut - My Little Brother.

ANNA NICOLE SMITH IS STILL DEAD, but her mother has given up the fight to bury the body in Texas, clearing any obstacle to a burial today in the Bahamas, compler with an "over the top" memorial hosting about 300 guests.

JOHN TRAVOLTA thinks Anna Nicole Smith could have been saved by Scientology.

THE FRENCH HOTEL has been banned from Associated Press stories by the wire service's entertainment editor, prompting debate among journos.  Of course, she might make the other wires if she lands in jail for violating her probation.

GREY'S ANATOMY:  Disgruntled star Katherine Heigl was smacked down in a press release from ABC expressing disappointment that her less-than-equal salary bump was leaked to the press and reminding the world that Heigl remains bound by a long-term contract.

HUGH GRANT:  A Dutch TV reporter handcuffed herself to Hugh Grant at last Friday's Amsterdam premiere of Music & Lyrics.  Appropriately enough, some wag has turned the incident into a music video.

JUDE LAW said he was "speechless" after receiving a prestigious French award for his contribution to film.  Presumably because could not bring himself to think about being lumped in with Jerry Lewis.

ARNOLD SCHWARZENEGGER, contrary to prior reports, will make a cameo appearance the in forthcoming Terminator 4.

ANTONELLA BARBA, the focus of recent attention over some racy Internet photos, survived the most recent cut on American Idol.  Was it despite the photos, or because of them?

JENNA FISCHER, who plays Pam on NBC's The Office, is looking hot in photos from the upcoming Will Ferrell comedy, Blades of Glory.

THE TOP TEN GREATEST FILM SPEECHES (with embedded video) compiled by Not Defteri is not bad, though it really only goes back to 1954.  But there's also a link to a far more complete list.  One of the videos has been yanked, but there's a lo-fi version to be had.

IRAQ:  US soldiers are leaving their fortified bases and establishing many small outposts in the capital's most violent neighborhoods in a major tactical shift under the two-week-old Baghdad security plan.  Fifteen of about 30 planned "joint security stations" with Iraqi forces have already in the capital.  They have also set up an unspecified number of smaller "combat outposts."  A joint security station in Sadr City should open in a few days.  A a prominent Shiite cleric with high-level political ties survived an assassination attempt on one of Baghdad's quietest days in months - with one reported car bombing and one fatality.  The Iraqi Interior Ministry announced that 80 suspected al-Qaeda were killed in heavy fighting Wednesday in a village near Fallujah.

IRAN is stalling any answer to the invitation to the planned conference on Iraq's future, after being caught off guard by Washington's enthusiastic endorsement of the meeting.  Tehran's client Hezbollah denied a US intell claim it was training Iraqi militants in Lebanon on how to operate armor-piercing munitions against US troops in Iraq.

AFGHANISTAN:  Mullah Omar and new threat Mullah Dadullah seem to have been feeling more comfy in advance of an expected spring Taliban offensive, but Mullah Obaidullah Akhund, former Taliban defense minister and #3 on the ladder of the Taliban's 10-member leadership council, was captured in Quetta.  ABCNews reports that Akhund may know the secret whereabouts of Mullah Omar, and perhaps of Osama bin Laden and Ayman al Zawahri.

IOWA:  Gov. Chet Culver  declared all Iowa 99 counties disaster areas after last weekend's ice and snowstorm knocked the power out to thousands of people, including families of Pate members.

OWEN & MZEE UPDATE:  The giant tortoise and orphaned baby hippo who forged an unusual friendship after the 2004 tsunami in southeast Asia are the stars of a new Web site so fans can follow their progress.

OTHER ODD PALS:  A pair of Sumatran tiger cubs and a set of young orangutans, all abandoned at birth, have become inseparable after sharing a room at an Indonesian zoo.  Awww...some photo and video at the link.

MOLLY the CAT has made it home four months after disappearing from a beach resort 150 kilometers away in New Zealand.

A SQUIRREL, unlike a cat, really gets stuck in a tree when he gets stuck in a tree.  Pre-rescue photo at the link.

A COW stares unamazed as it forces an airplane to land on Interstate 84 near the Oregon-Idaho border.

THE SPINTO BAND'S  latest video -- for "Brown Boxes" -- is so very them.

BOB DYLAN comes off as kinder and gentler in a new version of D.A. Pennebaker's famed documentary Don't Look Back.  But he comes off even wackier at Dylan Hears a Who, where a decent imposter sings Dr. Seuss.  It may not work with Internet Explorer, but it's worth downloading Firefox to hear "Green Eggs and Ham" in the style of "Tombstone Blues."

THE CHAMBER STRINGS' second album, Month of Sundays, harbored "the kind of pop dreams that warrant serious discussion next to the work of Brian Wilson, Ray Davies, Laura Nyro or Alex Chilton," according to Greg Kot of the Chicago Tribune.  But heroin addiction and homelessness put frontman Kevin Junior a day away from death before he got clean.  You can stream three tracks from that album via NPR, where Tom Moon made it a Shadow Classic.  You can also stream a few, including  sparse versions of new material, via the band's MySpace page. 

DEEP PURPLE:  A live album has been withdrawn from sale after singer Ian Gillan told fans the CD featured one of the legendary group's worst ever concerts.  Sony is checking why Gillan was not told of the release.

YOU TUBE failed to reach an agreement with CBS to host clips from shows such as The Late Show with David Letterman, as the parties unable to agree to terms including how long the deal would run.  Parent company Google and CBS intend to work together only on more modest initiatives.

SEEN YOUR VIDEO:  Dug up from the grooveyard of forgotten favorites is Guadalcanal Diary with "Watusi Rodeo," as it aired on MTV's Basement Tapes (with VJ Nina Blackwell) so many moons ago.

BECK was recently profiled on the World Cafe, so you can stream a mini-set from NPR now.

SUFJAN STEVENS hints that the next state he will tackle in his "50 State Project" of albums will be California.  IIRC, he's thrown Texas around as a candidate as well.

RHETT MILLER:  The Old 97s frontman does not like the "alt-country" label, but adds: "I guess if I had to live in one of those ghettos, I would choose that, rather than angry modern rock full of pointy guitars and eyeliner."  You can stream a few of his whatever via HisSpace.

JAMES BROWN:   An agreement reprotedly has been reached over obtaining DNA samples from the late Godfather of Soul's body, in order to help sort out several paternity claims made against the singer since he died two months ago.

BRADGELINA:  Jolie shows off her CFR cred by penning an op-ed on Darfur for the Washington Post, pushing for prosecution of the perps in the International Criminal Court.  Jolie is encouraged by ICC prosecutors charging a junior Sudanese Cabinet official and a top commander of pro-government militias as first war-crimes suspects, though reformers in Sudan are disappointed.  BTW, the charged Sudanese official takes inspiration from the example of Saddam Hussein.  So when Jolie asks, "would we in America ever accept the logic that we shouldn't prosecute murderers because the threat of prosecution might provoke them to continue killing?", my answer would be that there are plenty of Americans who think fighting terrorists and their sponsors only creates more terrorists.  I wish Jolie luck in convincing them otherwise.

THE McCARTNEYS:  Heather Mills brought a spare leg to her practice for Dancing with the Stars.  Pic at the link.  Mills tells TV's Extra: "I have no fear; I'm quite happy to be thrown around and hopefully my leg will stay on."

VINCENT PASTORE, otoh, has dropped out of Dancing With the Stars, as the 60-year-old actor said the training was too strenuous.  I can't imagine what his old pals from The Sopranos will call him.

MADONNA chides daughter Lourdes for wearing tight jeans: "Can't you wear something else? You have a closet full of clothes and you wear the same pants every day. And please wear a belt because I don't want to see your butt crack when you bend over."

BEYONCE KNOWLES and a flock of SI swimsuit models may have been exposed to acute hepatitis A by an employee of Wolfgang Puck Catering.  And don't be surprised if they aren't the only celebs involved; TMZ had an item about a very famous movie mogul that has mysteriously vanished from its site.  UPDATE:  Beyonce did not eat at the party.

BRITNEY SPEARS had to be convinced, cajoled and even badgered into rehab by her mother, lawyer and even Fed-Ex.  The pop tart's bald head is turning on The Gossip's frontwoman, Beth Ditto, who says it "makes her look like a butch dyke."

ANNA NICOLE SMITH IS STILL DEAD, but we are still getting stories about her sufferring from lupus, and that -- according to the National Enquirer -- preliminary findings from the autopsy show Smith died from a severe case of pneumonia, not a drug overdose.

CHRISTIE BRINKLEY is recovering from emergency back surgery, following a skiing injury that occurred during a recent family ski trip.  How long has she had a weak back?  Longer than for the punchline.

PAMELA ANDERSON, credited with inflicting Ugg boots onto the global fashion scene, denounced the footwear on her website, having just figured out they are made from shaved sheepskin.

P DIDDY is being investigated by the LAPD for allegedly attacking a man at a Hollywood Oscar afterparty.  Meanwhile, Misa Hylton denied that Diddy took their 12-year-old-son for a lapdance and said she she fired the security team that was supposed to be watching the boy that night.

HOLLYWOOD MADAM Jody "Babydol" Gibson has written a book naming two dozen celebrities she says patronized her call-girl service, including Bruce Willis, Ben Affleck, Jim Belushi, Gary Busey and Sex Pistols guitarist Steve Jones.  Most of those named have issued denials.  There is an adults-only excerpt about Willis floating around the Internet.

GREY'S ANATOMY:  Katherine Heigl has dropped out of contract talks with the show over salary, according to People magazine.  Isaiah Washington, still rehabbing his image from an anti-gay slur, has signed with openly gay PR crisis expert Howard Bragman and his company.  And the cast is generally miffed about being blindsided with the news that Kate Walsh's character is being spun off to her own show, according to Star magazine.

GLOBAL WARMING:  A former Canadian defense minister is demanding governments worldwide disclose and use secret alien technologies obtained in alleged UFO crashes to stem climate change.  No, really.

IRAQ:  An Iraqi newspaper reports that in the recent attack at the Ministry of Public Works, the bomb was placed under Vice President Mahdi's seat, and the person that detonated the device was inside the ministry -- which is run by Muqtada al-Sadr's political bloc,  Azzam reports that a referendum on the fate of the oil producing city of Kirkuk has been delayed for two years -- a good sign, given fears that the referendum could have set off a powder keg.

IRAN and IRAQ:  The Bush Administration has agreed to join high-level talks sought by Iraq with Iran and Syria on the future of Iraq. White House spokesman Tony Snow noted it won't be the first time they have sat with Iran on Iraq-related issues.  The generally dovish Sen. Carl Levin (D-MI), Chairman of the Armed Service Cmte, wants to know our plan for stopping Iran and Syria from arming terrorists and militias.  Current and former intelligence officials say that Tehran has recruited its own network of Iraqi Shiite extremists to use armor-piercing weapons against US and coalition forces rather than against Sunni rivals.

TWO-LEGGED DOGS:  Dominic the Greyhound Pup leads a fairly normal life, despite having only his left legs, in a video clip from Animal Planet.  Faith, who manages with just her back legs, was lost and found by American Airlines.

CANE TOADS may soon be subject to a beer-for-a-bag-of-toads bounty supported by Australia's biggest private hotel owner and the RSPCA.  ALSO:  Don't eat raw frogs.

ORANGUTAN ESCAPE DRILL goes awry at the Tama Zoo in Tokyo, Japan.  Photos at the link.

STOLEN BULLDOGS were recovered 150 miles from their home in Iberia, MO, with an assist from a private eye.

PIGEONS may be remote-controlled by scientists at the Robot Engineering Technology Research Center at Shandong University of Science and Technology in eastern China.

IGGY POP claims he is struggling to get his kicks in old age, but when I hear new  Stooges' tracks like "The Weirdness" or  "Free and Freaky" (Real | Win), it sounds like he's exaggerating.  Iggy and The Stooges got a lengthy profile over the weekend in the New York Times that starts with the Ig discussing the classic Stooges video I've posted here previously.  The NYT piece even has MP3 samples.

ARCADE FIRE:  Neon Bible doesn't come out until next week, but you can stream the whole album now, via NME.

THE PIPETTES have inked a US record deal with Interscope subsidiary Cherrytree.  They hope to finally release We Are The Pipettes in June, with bonus tracks not on the UK release that will run you 30 bucks as an import.  In the meantime, you can always stream a few via TheirSpace.

DR. DOG, a psychedelic pop band from Philly, gets some local love from the World Cafe, which you can stream via NPR.  The band has been generating blog buzz, too -- so there's plenty to jukebox via the ol' HM.

MARK OLSON will have a cameo from former co-Jayhawk Greg Louris on his second solo album, due this June.

GUN CLUB:  Blank Forever has posted a bunch of their punk-blues classics.  You can jukebox 'em via the ol' HM, but I have to throw in some live video for the missing "Sex Beat." 

THE RAKES:  London's Guardian says they make "the thinking person's drinking music. Or the drinking person's thinking music."  I would agree that the band is closer to Franz Ferdinand or Bloc Party than drinking music, but you can stream a bunch via the ol' HM and decide for yourself.  Obvs, I can't pass up a track named "When Tom Cruise Cries."

THE HOLD STEADY can be more credibly said to make the thinking person's drinking music , but frontman Craig Finn doesn't consider their stuff "literary," telling Stylus: "I mean, we're trying to separate ourselves from guys like the Decemberists. That dude has read so many books. I haven't read any books compared to him."

LOU BARLOW talks to the San Jose Mercury News about the Sebadoh reunion and his surprise success with "Natural One,'' the single by his side project Folk Implosion.

CHRIS CORNELL supposedly quit Audioslave due to "irresolvable personality conflicts," but sources told Page Six it was all about the Benjamins.  He tells Spinner that his next solo LP, due May 1st, will include a cover of Michael Jackson's "Billie Jean."  You can still stream his live acoustic version via the ol' HM.

BRITNEY SPEARS:  Sources tell TMZ that doctors at her rehab facility think the underlying reason for her trouble may be post-partum depression or bipolar disorder.  That either is more sympathetic than substance abuse is just a happy coincidence.  If believed, it would hurt sales of the Britney Shears doll on eBay.  At least she's got Pete Townshend in her corner, though she seems a bit old for him.

HELEN MIRREN has been invited to tea with Queen Elizabeth II.  Her Majesty rooted for the actress to win an Oscar for The Queen, though she would never watch it herself.  Proof -- if any were needed -- that "Her Majesty" is a pretty nice girl.

ALAN ARKIN hoped his ten-year-old costar, Abigail Breslin, would lose the Oscar for Best Supporting Actress: "I hope she loses frankly. No, I'm serious. I am not joking... She is a kid; she needs to have a childhood."  More, including Arkin admitting he doesn't like awards, at the link.

EDDIE MURPHY is not a sore loser for leaving the Oscars after losing Best Supporting Actor to Alan Arkin.  His rep claims he did the same thing after he won the same award at the Golden Globes.

TOM-KAT UPDATE:  US Weekly describes the couple's behavior at Vanity Fair's Oscars afterparty in a way that brings the term "Stepford Wife" easily to mind.

ANNA NICOLE SMITH IS STILL DEAD, but baby-daddy wannabe Larry Birkhead finally met 5-month-old Dannielynn Smith, who threw up on him.  Probably reminded him of Anna.   Meanwhile, wacky jurist Larry Seidlin has been mulling TV offers, including a segment on CBS's Early Show.

WHITNEY-BOBBY BREAK-UPDATE:  Bobby Brown seems to have had some difficulty raising the 19K bail to get of jail for unpaid child support and court fees. 

P DIDDY took his 12-year-old son for a lapdance.

GWYNETH PALTROW discovered that being a housewife is a hard job.

CHRISTINA RICCI says that playing a chained-up half-naked nymphomaniac in the upcoming Black Snake Moan helped her overcome her prudish nature, so she now parades around in her underwear.  Slideshow at the link.  You can stream versions of the song "Black Snake Moan" via the ol' HM.  You can watch the trailer, and even see Richard Roeper and guest Kevin Smith review the movie on the Tube, but the clip of the sex scene with Ricci and JT is long gone by now.

SCARLETT JOHANSSON skipped the Oscars to tour the slums of India on behalf of Oxfam.  She visited an Oxfam-funded school set up for the "untouchable" Dalit caste.

AFGHANISTAN:  A Taliban suicide bomber killed 18 outside the Kabul base where VP Cheney was visiting. Lt. Col. David Accetta said the bomber did not try to get past any US-staffed security checkpoints before detonating himself a mile away from the VP.   The Taliban are executing informants after three senior commanders were killed in the last three months.

EGYPT:  An Egyptian state-run satellite firm has stopped transmitting al-Zawraa TV, a/k/a "MujTV," a 24-hour station set up by the Islamic Army of Iraq (and subordinate to the Mujahideen Shura Council) to broadcast jihadi propaganda into Iraq.  Analysts pointed to US and Arab diplomatic pressure as a likely reason, but Nilesat claimed it was because the channel created a "buzz" that interfered with other channels.  I'll say!  MujTV is still available through our friends, the Saudis.

IRAQ:  Multinational Forces Iraq is "holding talks with commanders of Muqtada al-Sadr's Al-Mahdi Army with the 'Iraqi Government's blessing,'" as well as with other armed groups.  An aide claims that al-Sadr has not withdrawn his support for the new security plan, claiming a prior statement was misread by the media.  The buzz in Baghdad continues to be that al-Sadr is "doing some very deadly housecleaning," as Mahdi Army members have been disappearing or turning up dead in the Sadr City, Kadhimiya, and Baladiyat areas of the capital.  US-led strike forces seized suspected Shiite death squad bosses Tuesday in raids on Sadr City.  The AP claims -- without support --  that bombings have not slackened off, whereas the US military says that "reporting of sectarian murders is at the lowest level in almost a year" and bomb attacks have been reduced by 20 percent.  Nevertheless, the military rightly cautions against projecting a trend into the early figures.  One of Iraq's two VPs and the minister of public works escaped an assassination attempt.

CHACHI the MARMOSET frequently bites his owners and has assumed control over their dog, riding it like a horse.  This is right in my backyard; it turns out that Illinois is one of 19 states with no laws governing the private ownership of nonhuman primates.  So I'm thinking about becoming a part-time organ grinder.

MAN'S BEST FRIEND:  Dude, an eight-year-old mixed-breed hound, gave his life saving his owner from an attacking black bear.

NOT MAN'S BEST FRIEND:  A pet python strangled its 69-year-old owner in southern Vietnam, despite his daughter-in-law's desperate efforts to save him.

KOALA BEARS are totally into lesbian sex orgies Down Under.

LONELY ANIMAL LOVERS can get a hookup through a Dutch website.  And as the story comes out of Amsterdam, I hasten to add, "with other pet owners."