ONE DAY LEFT on that eBay auction of a near-complete set of 45s issued by the Sub Pop Singles Club. As you're reading this, Craig O'Neill's ears are burning.
ON THE PITCHFORK: Modest Mouse announce its U.S. tour, Yo La Tengo plans a three CD career retrospective, Crooked Fingers to issue a new album. Also, a cover of Cream's "Politician," by Chris Stamey & Yo La Tengo.
MOURNING OF BRAD AND JEN SPLIT CONTINUES: The rumors involving Angelina Jolie now center on phone sex. PLUS: The tsunami issues a statement on the breakup.
WHY I LOVE LAWYERS (IRAQ edition): A lawyer for the accused ringleader in the Abu Ghraib prisoner abuse scandal addressed the charge of piling naked prisoners into pyramids by rhetorically asking, "Don't cheerleaders all over America form pyramids six to eight times a year. Is that torture?" But the cheerleaders aren't forced to do so naked, as fair as I know. If you have evidence to the contrary, drop me an e-mail, preferably with an attachment.
AMBER FREY autographs a copy of her book (i.e., the one bearing her name) for New York Post scribe Andrea Peyser. The favor is not returned.
THE GOVERNATOR'S SECRET WEAPON: Most people have not noticed that California Republicans now chair the most important committees in the House of Representatives: Appropriations (spending), Ways and Means (taxes, Social Security and Medicare), Rules (controls whiich bills go to the floor and the terms of debate), Armed Services and Homeland Security. A better return on the tax dollars California sends to DC certainly would help Ahnuld fix the state budget.
POLITICS allowed Polio to spread in Nigeria.
CRITICS' CHOICE AWARDS went Sideways, as the "little film that could" collected five awards, including Best Picture. Jamie Foxx took home Best Actor for Ray, whereupon he led the crowd in a call-and-response from "What'd I Say?"
THE SCREEN ACTORS GUILD nominations have been announced.
DESPERATE HOUSEWIVES has sneaky product placement.
MR. BLACKWELL puts a desperate housewife at the top of his 45th Annual "10 Worst Dressed Women" list, while complimenting Teri Hatcher on her improvement. You could probably guess most of the fashion victims (e.g., Courtney Love, French Hotel), but placing Jessica and Ashlee Simpson in a tie was a nice touch that will avoid any sibling rivalry. The big surprise was number nine.
ASK METAFILTER rounds up MP3 blogs.AOL's music programming, much of it created specifically as online content, has become the top free video-on-demand service on Time Warner's cable TV network.
LITTLE STEVEN'S UNDERGROUND GARAGE: Top 15 Records of 2004. Garage records, that is... black gold... Texas Tea...
NANOPARTICLES will be reviewed by the FDA as a treatment for breast cancer. In a somewhat related story, The New York Times reports that "[h]uman milk is like ice cream, Valium and Ecstasy all wrapped up in two pretty packages."
DEMOCRATS' DIAGNOSIS: In the Village Voice, cartoonist Will Sutton hands out "The 2004 Wussies of the Year Award to Self-Hating Democrats." on the other hand, at NewDonkey.com, an unofficial weblog sponsored by the Democratic Leadership Council, disputes the notion that Clintonism is to blame for the party's fortunes.
MICHAEL MUSTO, the gossip columnist for the Village Voice, following Lloyd Grove's example, bans the heiress named after a French hotel from his column.
GUIDED BY VOICES: Reviews of their last show continue to roll in. Here's one in Filter magazine.
NEW ORDER: New disc. New details. New Musical Express. Also a story detailing the planned biopic of suicidal Joy Division frontman Ian Curtis.
DAN'S THE MAN desperately dialing Jenny.
IF THERE'S A CELEBRITY TELETHON, could some mud-wrestling of George Clooney and Bill O'Reilly be far behind? At least they managed to kiss and make up the next day. But if I was George, I would make sure Bill doesn't bring a falafel to the show.
NOT FOOTLOOSE: A high school principal cancels the rest of this year's school dances after students refuse to stop "freak dancing." I guess the kids will have to dance in a barn across the tracks.
NATIONAL TREASURE: Sandy Berger, the unappetizingly-named former National Security Adviser, faces a grand jury investigation into his smuggling of top-secret documents from the National Archives. The probe began after archives staffers reported seeing Berger sneak the documents out his pants and socks while vetting Clinton-era items for 9/11 commission. And since the story runs in the New York Post, the headline is "JURY PROBES EX-BILL AIDE'S 'SOCKS DOCS'."
MICHAEL MOORE AND MEL GIBSON chummy at the People's Choice Awards? It's the New World Order, I tell you!